On August 28, 2024, U.S. Surgeon General Vivek H. Murthy released a National Health Advisory titled “Parents Under Pressure: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Mental Health & Well-Being of Parents.” If you're a parent, you probably don't need a national report to tell you that parenting can be overwhelming—but this advisory dives into just how serious the mental health struggles of U.S. parents have become and why it matters not only for parents but also for their kids.
Let’s break down what the advisory says, why parents are feeling more stressed than ever, and what you can do to support your mental health.
Why Are Parents So Stressed?
It’s no secret that parenting is tough, but research shows it’s tougher than ever. Over the past decade, parents have reported significantly higher levels of stress compared to non-parents. 41% of the 63 million parents in the U.S. say they feel too stressed to function most days. Why is this happening?
For starters, parenting stress changes as kids grow. New parents face the challenge of adjusting to a new role while parents of older kids deal with school issues, teen independence, and the constant juggling act of work, relationships, and family responsibilities. The mental “to-do list” that comes with parenting can be exhausting. Add in financial worries, lack of sleep, and other external pressures, and it’s easy to see why so many parents feel like they’re barely hanging on.
What’s Stressing Parents Out the Most?
The Surgeon General’s report highlights several key stressors that are taking a toll on parents:
Money Worries: Childcare costs have shot up by 26% over the last decade, and many parents are struggling to make ends meet. One in four parents worry about being able to afford basic needs, and families living in poverty or facing job insecurity feel the pressure even more.
Time Crunch: Between work and caring for kids, many parents barely have time for themselves or their partners. This lack of “me time” can lead to burnout and poor sleep, making everything feel harder.
Kids’ Health and Well-Being: Parents are also worried about their children’s mental and physical health. About 75% of parents fear their child may struggle with anxiety or depression, and 20% of kids have special healthcare needs, which adds extra stress to the family.
Safety Concerns: From school shootings to bullying and even fears of kidnapping, parents are constantly worried about their children’s safety. It’s worth noting that firearm violence is now the leading cause of death for kids and teens in the U.S., which only adds to the anxiety.
Feeling Lonely: Parenting can be isolating, and many parents report feeling lonelier than adults without kids.
Tech Troubles: Social media and technology have changed the parenting game, and not necessarily for the better. Many parents believe it’s harder to raise kids now than it was 20 years ago because of technology's impact on their kids’ mental health.
Cultural Pressures: There’s also the pressure to “get it right” when it comes to parenting, with constant societal expectations adding to the stress load.
What Does This Mean for Parents’ Mental Health?
All these stressors add up, and the result is a higher risk of mental health issues for parents. Research shows that parents who experience violence, poverty, or discrimination are even more likely to struggle with their mental health. Depression and anxiety are common, especially during the perinatal period (pregnancy and postpartum), affecting both moms and dads. About 24% of parents report dealing with at least one mental health condition.
How Does This Impact Kids?
When parents are struggling, it can take a toll on their children too. Kids of parents with mental health concerns are more likely to develop issues like anxiety, depression, and developmental disorders. The situation gets worse if there are additional factors, like financial stress or family conflict. It’s a ripple effect that can impact kids for the rest of their lives.
What Can Parents Do to Relieve Stress?
The good news is that there are ways to manage stress, and the Surgeon General’s report offers a few helpful tips:
Take Care of Yourself: Self-care is not just a buzzword—it’s essential. Whether it’s exercising, meditating, getting enough sleep, or just taking a break to relax, these small actions can make a big difference in your mental health. It’s easy to feel guilty about taking time for yourself but remember: you can’t pour from an empty cup.
Connect with Others: You don’t have to go through this alone. Find other parents to talk to, whether that’s through a parenting group, a support network, or just friends and family. Sharing your struggles and getting advice from others can make a world of difference.
Get Health Insurance if Possible: Having health coverage for your family can reduce anxiety about medical costs and make sure you have access to the care you need, including mental health support.
Reach Out for Help: If things are getting overwhelming, don’t hesitate to ask for help. Talk to friends, family, or a mental health professional if you’re struggling. If you’re in crisis, call the Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 833-TLC-MAMA or the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988. Both lines are available 24/7, and support is available in English and Spanish.
Final Thoughts: You’re Not Alone
Parenting is hard, and feeling stressed doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong—it just means you’re human. Try incorporating some of these tips into your routine and see if they help. And remember, if you need extra support, it’s okay to ask for help.
At Aspen Ridge Counseling Center, we’re here for you. Our therapists are ready to support parents dealing with anxiety, depression, and other mental health concerns. Give us a call at (801) 990-4300 to talk to a provider today.
You don’t have to face this alone—help is just a phone call away.
For more on the Surgeon General’s report, check out the full advisory [here].
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